NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

Here we go then:

1. Loose 3 stone - very important!

2. Concentrate on learning French.

3. Take more pride in my home - ie. do more housework :(

I think I'll leave it at that - if I can at least do number 1, I will be very happy :)

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE XX

AMELIA'S 1ST CHRISTMAS

It seems ages ago, but 5 days ago was Christmas.... & Amelia's 1st Christmas. It was great! As usual, after much hype, Alice was sooo excited, she didn't wake up until nearly 8am. We went downstairs & discovered that "he'd been"! Poor old Father Christmas must have spent most of the night at our house, unloading a ridiculous amount of presents for both girls. Alice set about opening & Amelia finally woke up - she seemed to know that something was different & enjoyed eating gift tags & bows. They had some really great presents, so thank you to all concerned.

Then came the turn of the lunch, & my 1st Christmas lunch - I'd previously cooked turkey one Easter, but never for Christmas day. A couple of months ago I'd got 'Nigella Christmas' & as she is my true inspiration to anything culinary (a Goddess!), I stuck to quite a few of her recipes & to her timing chart & I have to say that it was the best Christmas lunch I've ever had. It was completely stress free - so I still don't understand what all the fuss is about.

I had brined the turkey the day before, to make it super juicy - I made allspice gravy, perfect bread sauce & the most fantastic gingerbread stuffing mmmm! I did however stick to my own vegetables & my gorgeous Guinness Christmas pudding - well, you can't copy everything from the Master -tips & pointers are all one needs.

Joining the Briddon's Christmas were, Mum, Joyce, Eric & Dianne - David didn't make it as he had "the bug" - but he did pop round to collect a plated up meal. He probably enjoyed his peace & quiet more than anything anyway.

So now thoughts are to next year & Christmas here again, but with my lot this time.

GO ME-EE, GO ME-EE!

5 weeks ago today, I thought 'Right, it's 6 weeks to Christmas & it's very possible to loose 10lbs in 6 weeks'. I was so right! It's still 1 week to Christmas & I have lost 12lb!!!! This makes me very happy :) Now it doesn't matter if I put half a stone on on Christmas day ... bring on the roast potatoes!

Merry Christmas to everyone .. fat & thin!

OOOH! I FEEL A REALLY BAD

Last week Alice & Amelia were poorly :( On Thursday I joined in & we all felt really rough. In stepped my lovely Mum - on her 2 days off she came round & looked after us - resulting in her catching the lurgy from us. She has just phoned me & asked if she could pop round after she had picked up her prescription from the doctors, to see the girls. Unfortunately I instantly asked her not to as... "Alice is better now & I don't really want her to re-catch anything"! What a bitch!!! I have since called her back & begged forgiveness & pleaded with her to call round, but she won't! I feel really bad now!

CHRISTMAS ADMISSION

Driving home from Sainsburys, I have just realised that I know 95% of the words to Wizzard's 'I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday', including all the talkie bits - I got a bit lost on the 2nd verse, but not for long!

DELIVERY CHIMPS

I know that Christian isn't fond of City Link couriers - he calls them Shitty Link, maybe missing link would be more apt, well they have competition ... big style- TNT!

I heard a knock on the door this morning & opened it to find a gurning runt of a little man stood there. "I've just delivered a parcel to no.9", he was very proud to tell me. "Really?", "Yes.... it was for you....... you weren't in last time so I took it straight there instead....... when I saw you were in, no.9 said she'd bring it round........it's a book or something!"

What a fricking muppet! Firstly, why not check to see if I was in before he found my parcel a surrogate home. And secondly, when he saw that I was in (ie. lights on, car in drive & small child in window), why the hell did he still leave the parcel with my neighbour, walk to my door & inform me that the neighbour was bringing the parcel for him....... he could have just brought it!

FORMULA FOOD - RESULTS

Better late than never, here are the results (in my opinion) in ascending order.

18. Canada - Poutine
17. Australia - Kangaroo Stroganoff
16. China - Lumpia Shanghai
15. Belgium - Moules et Frites
14. Italy - Saltimbocca
13. Monaco - Bouillabaisse
12. France - Cassoulet
11. Turkey - Kebabs
10. Spain - Paella
9. Malaysia - Fish Curry
8. Hungary - Goulash
7. Brazil - Feijoda
6. Valencia - Calons a la Barcelonesa
5. Germany - Sauerbraten
4. Japan - Sushi
3. Bahrain - Falafel Pittas
2. Singapore - Bak Chor Mee
1. Britain - Concession Stands

Most of these were really nice & the top 10 was very close. Britain had to win really & for 1 reason only - sitting in a cold draughty grandstand with the rain pouring down, cuddled up to the man I love waiting for the qualifying to start, drinking hot chocolate & eating doughnuts...perfect!

ALICE

We were talking about our Christmas turkey the other day, telling someone that we'd been to see it. Alice then said "I'm not going to have turkey at Christmas, I'll have a sausage." "Oh, why's that?" I asked. "Sausages don't have heads!"

SLICE 'N' SPICE

Last night whilst chopping carrots & daydreaming (not the best idea) - I chopped the end of my finger off. Not just a nick but an actual disc of finger came off - I saved it to show Christian!
After swearing, hopping, feeling dizzy & sick I remembered that my mother-in-law said that turmeric was the thing for cuts. As the initial white end of my finger started turning red, followed by a river of blood, I emptied a pot of ground turmeric into an egg cup & stuck what was left of my finger in it.

It started really stinging straight away but low & behold in under a minute it had stopped bleeding! I packed more turmeric on it & bandaged it up in kitchen roll & plasters & it still hasn't bled anymore - amazing! I do have a very yellow finger this morning, it looks like I've been smoking again! Note to everyone: keep some ground turmeric in your cupboard.

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 18

BRAZIL = FEIJOADA

So here we are with the last round of 'formula food', I'm already thinking about next year - not formula 1 though I might do religious festivals - we'll see.
What a way to end though, we nearly choked on our feijoada (pronounced fezu-ada), what a fantastic race & a worthy champion. I'm so pleased Amelia was a girl - how cheesy would it look to have a baby called Lewis this year?! Anyway...food - this recipe has been Englished down a bit ie no feet & ears but all the same its great.

Conclusion: A stew of much porkiness! A bit fatty due to the amount of pork, but better the second day when the set fat could be lifted off.
Would I make it again? Yes, its real winter stick-to-your-bones food - yum yum!

Feijoada:
5tbsp olive oil, 2lb pork belly -trimmed of skin & most fat, 1lb pancetta, 1lb ham hocks, 3 chopped onions, 3 sliced carrots, 3 crushed cloves of garlic, 2 chopped green peppers, 2 bay leaves, 1 tin tomatoes, 400g roughly chopped chorizo, half tsp ground black pepper, 1tsp paprika, 2 400g tins of butter beans, bunch of coriander.

1. Pre heat oven to gm3/160c. Chop all meat into large chunks & brown in batches in 2tbsp of oil in a large casserole. Remove to a plate.

2. Heat remaining oil & gently fry onions, carrots, garlic, peppers & bay for 10 mins. Add the tomatoes, chorizo, browned meat & spices then cover with enough water to barely cover the meat. Bring to boil, cover & bake in oven for 2 hours.

3. Drain & rinse the butter beans, add them to the casserole, stir & bake for another 30mins.

4. Sprinkle with chopped coriander & serve in bowls with loads of crusty bread.

ALICE'S 4TH BIRTHDAY - DAY 3

Sunday..... the train ride. I've been saying to Alice that we could have a go on this since we saw it on 'The Tweenies' & it seemed like a nice way to end the birthday weekend - hmmm. To start with, it had been raining all morning & everyone seemed a bit grumpy, then when we arrived at Rowsley station Alice was 'playing dead' in her car seat - that didn't amuse me in the slightest. Apart from the fact that it terrified me, I've seen enough of that from my Dad & sister... but for the real thing.

Eventually we started to enjoy ourselves. We got on the old steam train & it set off through the fields & along side a river, through Darley Dale & on to Matlock. It was really good, chuffing along the track. The engine changed ends at Matlock & after a few minutes we were heading back. The girls began to get a little restless (the trip lasted 50 mins - a bit of an ask for small children) & ended up banging heads together & crying for 5 mins or so!!! All in all it was a nice little outing & I would recommend it to any parents of train mad children.

Enough of that though - now it was time to go home for the Grand Prix & stress ourselves some more for another 2 hours - it paid off in the end ...well done Lewis!!

ALICE'S 4TH BIRTHDAY - DAY 2

Saturday was the actual birthday. After a rather long lie-in for such an excited birthday girl, Alice woke us all up at 7am, Christian & I went into her bedroom & began singing 'Happy Birthday', however half way through she asked us to stop! Ashamed of your parents by 4 years old - oh dear, she is going to have a long & painful childhood! We all came downstairs & Alice set about opening her massive pile of presents, this year she didn't need any help with the paper - how grown up! Amelia was quite happy to watch & eat paper, ahh :) We had a lovely leisurely morning, playing with new toys, eating chocolate crispies for breakfast & not getting dressed until 10.30!

We had asked Alice what she would like to do for her birthday & for the 2nd year running she had chosen a trip to Chatsworth farmyard, followed by a meal in her favourite restaurant...... the one with the train....... yes at 4 years old Uncle Sam's Chuck Wagon is a very refined restaurant!!
So at midday we set off for Chatsworth, yes it was a bit late but we know Alice very well & we knew that after being there for all of 1 hour she would have had enough. After a look round all the animals, a bit of a play in the adventure playground & a trip to the farm shop (supplies for Sunday's formula food) we were sat in Uncle Sam's before 3pm - a record I think! Christian & I had cheeseburgers, Alice had a hot dog, raspberry milkshake & strawberry ice cream with chocolate sauce & mini marshmallows & Amelia had her first chip! Then it was back home for more toys & sugar.

Now Alice is a big girl I have taken the drop down cot side off her bed & as her Granny bought her a string of fairy shaped fairy lights - which I have put around her bed, she doesn't need the bedroom light on anymore - well done Alice!! xx

ALICE'S 4TH BIRTHDAY - DAY 1

Friday was Alice's 4th birthday party. Her actually birthday was Saturday but we (the mum's & children we see every Friday) always have a party on the nearest Friday - so that's what happened.
We had a great time with plenty of the usually party food, sandwiches, sausages, chocolate crispies & jelly & ice cream mmmm! & a bit extra for the mum's! I also made a Numberjacks 4 cake by special request from Alice.

After far too much sugar, it was time to play some party games the 1st being good old pass the parcel. As they are still little, no one actually wins, there was a bag of Maltesers under every wrapper, yet Alice was astonished on her turn to open the parcel to find ..... Maltesers! We then played musical statues & pin the tail on the donkey. We believe that Charlotte could see through the blind fold, I've never seen a child put the tail near the cross then move it to be exactly on the cross! Then it was time for a free-style disco in the dining room so that the mum's could natter & drink tea...& eat jelly beans!

After the party was over, there was just time for a quick tidy up (don't you just love paper plates) & it was time to change into Halloween costumes (the girls, not me), light our pumpkin & wait for trick or treaters - we're still a bit little to go out so we scare people who come to the door instead!

ALICE

After a present bringing visit from Sally (my nephew Joseph's stepmother) this morning, I was trying to explain to Alice that Joseph has a stepmother & 2 stepsisters now. After a moments thought she said "Oh, so Joseph is just like Cinderella then!" I can't wait to tell Joe - he will be delighted!

GOBBLE GOBBLE

Today, Alice, Amelia, Mum & I have been to see & order our Christmas Turkey (did I mention I am doing Christmas..!). We are getting it from Hangram Lane Farm in Mayfield Valley (Sheffield). Every year we drive past their massive straw turkey & this year (as we're not at Christian's Mum's) we can actually buy one!!

The massive straw turkey means that they are Kellys Turkeys, who supply hundreds of places including Fortnum & Mason. Hangram Lane Farm get them from Kellys as chicks & rear them, slaughter & dress them themselves, which is why I wanted to go & have a look at them & where & how they are reared. Unfortunately they aren't free range - this is because apparently they would either be eaten by foxes or would starve as they wouldn't be able to feed in these temperatures. So they are barn reared. The barns were very spacious & open at 1 end & they had things to look at, peck at, perch on & the like. They even have an injured pen! because turkeys will peck at anything that is red, so if a bird gets injured the others will just peck at it & kill it. I was very impressed by what we saw & feel that the birds will be happy - well happy until neck wringing day!

I am also making the Christmas pudding tomorrow & I made my mincemeat & cake last week, so I have to say that plans are already on their way. I love Christmas & this year will be the best ever!

GINGER ROGERS MOVE OVER

I am on such a high, I have just got back from my first ever tap dancing lesson!

Alice & my friend Ruth's daughter Charlotte have been going to dance classes on a Saturday morning for a few weeks now. When their dance teacher first mentioned about them doing tap, she put on her tap shoes & did a few steps. Mine & Ruth's jaws dropped to the floor in amazement! It was then that we learnt we have both always wanted to tap dance - hence tonight's outing!

Shirley, the teacher (who has very little patience with 3 year olds!) is fantastic, so are all the other ladies who go. I say ladies as they are all older, 40s, 50s & 60s I would guess - they are so lovely & we had a great laugh, my jaw actually aches!

According to Shirley (& the others), we were brilliant for our first time. Its quiet hard but we have both been bitten by the tap bug! It's going to be shuffle, ball change, stamp, heel, tap down the aisles in Sainsburys for me from now on - I'll let you know how we progress!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 17

CHINA = LUMPIA SHANGHAI (SPRING ROLLS)

Well there's a whole world of delicious Chinese food out there, but the search engine kept on saying spring rolls & I love spring rolls so why not? Mistake no1.

Mistake no2 wasn't really my fault. Sheffield has always been quiet multi-cultural & for all your Oriental needs, everyone knows that London Road is the place to sort you out. Not anymore. Where have all the Oriental supermarkets gone? There were 2 main ones & numerous little shops, which are now all restaurants/take aways. Why? It's not that difficult to cook & I would have thought that more people nowadays are having a go at cooking it themselves anyway. Apart from that, where do all the little Chinese ladies go shopping? So instead of buying lumpia wrappers (spring roll wrappers), I ended up in Sainsburys buying filo pastry.

Mistake no3 was my fault. I thought I would be health conscious & as I was having to use filo anyway, I'd oven bake them instead of deep fat frying. I have previously made weight watchers spring rolls & they were made with filo pastry & oven baked & were really nice.

Mistake no4 was saying half way through cooking -"These are really easy to make, I hope they don't go all sloppy in the oven!" After having a half time peek, I noticed that some of the eggy-porky-prawny mixture had decided to leave the comfort of it's wrapper & set up home on the baking tray!

After cooking, I did stick them under the grill just to crisp up their underside.

Conclusion: I have to say I wanted to hate these, but I actually liked them! Spring rolls they ain't - sort of spring roll shaped dim sum they are!!
Would I make them again? No. I'd find a different recipe & stick to it - spring rolls need frying!

For reference only:
Shanghai Lumpia:
1lb pork mince, 1lb cooked peeled prawns, 1 bunch spring onions, 200g tin of whole water chestnuts, 2tsp salt, 2 tsp pepper, 2 tbsp soy sauce, 2 eggs & lumpia wrappers.

1. Fry off the mince in a dry pan & leave in a sieve to drain away any fat or juices.

2. In a small food processor, separately chop up the prawns, spring onions & water chestnuts. Then put everything into a large bowl & combine.

3. Place a tablespoon of the mixture on a spring roll wrapper & roll up, tucking the ends in & sealing them with a bit of water.

4. Fry in veg. oil until golden, or bake in a gm6 oven for 15 mins & be disappointed!! Serve with sweet chilli dipping sauce.

SO EXCITING!

Maybe I'm a bit sad but who cares? Not I. I have a great love of 2 things (children & family besides) - cooking & Christmas & it has always been a bit of a let down because I never get to cook Christmas for everyone as we always go to Christian's mum's. 1 year I was allowed to do a Christmas dinner for Easter, but it wasn't really the same!

But anyway, this year I finally persuaded Christian to have Christmas at our house, just us, the girls, my mum & hopefully Auntie Tricia. Christian's mum had bought me Nigella's new Christmas book & had made me decide that I was doing the big day, like it or lump it! Yesterday morning, I plucked up enough courage (helped along by the mother of all hangovers), & phoned my mother-in-law to tell her that we wouldn't be going to hers after all..... it went surprisingly well & she completely understood! Then the afternoon came & another phone call from Dianne "If Richard & Sam aren't coming after all, please can me, David, my mother & Eric come to yours too!!!"

As it happens Richard & Sam are going to her parents, so it's 10 for lunch then!! I must start writing lists!! So exciting!!!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 16

JAPAN = SUSHI

This isn't cooking at all, it's just creative play! I so understand why sushi chefs are trained for years. It's very fiddly, mainly because the rice is so sticky - even with wet hands. It's also quite time consuming - but worth it we thought.
Conclusion: Impressive looking & tasty but you need to be patient.
Would I make it again? Yes, it would be a good dinner party starter for an Oriental feast!

Sushi:
200g sushi rice, 4tbsp rice wine vinegar, 1tbsp sugar, 1tsp salt, fine strips of raw fish (I used tuna & salmon & I poached some tiger prawns in boiling water), a couple of inches of cucumber cut into batons, wasabi paste & a packet of nori seaweed sheets.

Soy & Sesame Dipping Sauce:
1/2tsp sesame seeds, 1tbsp brown sugar, 3tbsp soy sauce & 2 tbsp sherry.

1. Mix together the vinegar, salt & sugar & leave to one side to allow everything to dissolve. Cook the rice according to pack instructions. As soon as its ready, stir in the vinegar mixture & leave to go cold.

2. Place half a sheet of nori on a sushi rolling mat (Waitrose £1.89), with wet hands spread a couple of tablespoons of rice over the sheet, smear over a tiny bit of wasabi (I think I used a bit too much & our brains bled!) & top with a line of fish or cucumber. Tightly roll up in the rolling mat, trim the edges & cut into pieces.

3. Repeat using your own creative flair. I also shaped some rice in my hands & lay a prawn or a slice of fish on top.

4. To make the dipping sauce simply mix all the ingredients together & serve in little ramekin dishes along side your sushi.

YAY!

There I was, thinking I had been banished to the kingdom of size 16 forever.... but I have just tried on my size 14 brown cords & they fit! Something so simple has made me so happy :) What a materialistic flake I am - I know it's all about the person inside... there's just a bit less of me ;)

I LOVE AUTUMN

I've always loved autumn - probably because I was born in it & married in it & had my 1st baby in it! I love the smell of it. I love the chill of it. I love the colour of it. It just suits me. I mainly love the food of it! Yes lets get down to it! It's the weather of beef in Guinness, hot pot & casserole & dumplings on cold drizzly evenings - mmm. This week we had the 1st meat & potato pie & mushy peas of the season (yes Tracy, with Hendersons!). Salads/grilled meat/quiches etc are all very well, but bring on the autumn/winter food!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 15

SINGAPORE = BAK CHOR MEE

A week late I know, but we've all been ill :( This bak chor mee certainly unblocked one's sinus' though! Our tongues & lips tingled for ages after ;0
Conclusion: I love food like this, quick, tasty & hot.
Would I make it again? Oh yes, maybe a bit less chilli flakes next time!

Bak Chor Mee:
A couple of portions of noodles (I used rice noodles), 1tbsp ground nut oil, 3 sliced shallots, 500g minced pork, 2 tbsp dark soy sauce, 10-15 sliced Shiitake mushrooms, 1tbsp balsamic vinegar (or black rice vinegar), 1tbsp chilli flakes & 2 crushed cloves of garlic.

1. Place noodles in a bowl & cover with boiling water (or pack instructions for which ever noodles you use).

2. Heat oil in a wok & fry the shallots until golden then remove from wok leaving excess oil behind.

3. Fry the mince for 4-5 mins, add the soy sauce & continue stirring to break the meat up & make sure its browned. Add Shiitake mushrooms & vinegar & fry for another couple of mins. If it begins to look dry add a bit of water.

4. Add garlic & chilli flakes, fry for another 2 mins then add the drained noodles. Mix thoroughly & serve sprinkled with the fried shallots.

AMELIA'S CHRISTENING

Sunday 28th September was Amelia's Christening & it was a really lovely day. When I opened the curtains on Sunday morning, my heart sank a little - Saturday had been such a sunny day & now it was raining :( Never mind, its not actually about the weather, so we carried on with our long list of last minute things to do. I had to finish the children's sandwiches amongst other things & get to Christian's Mums for about 8:30 so I could finish my chocolate pavlovas off - I didn't fancy transporting the finished article - bit messy! We also had to take the cake that I had lovingly created over the past few months. As usual I had visions of dropping the bloody thing ( it weighed a tonne), but it made it in one piece & all was well. Christian also had to get Alice to my sister-in-laws so she could do her hair. Claire is brilliant at this -I would have probably just gone for bunches!

The church service started at 11am & was held at Dronfield Woodhouse Methodist Church - the same place we had Alice's 3 years ago. It was also Harvest Festival, I used to love this as a child. But unfortunately we didn't get to sing 'All Things Bright & Beautiful' I'm good at that! But we did have 'Great Is Thy Faithfulness' - which is one of Mum's favourites (& funeral choices!) so I knew she would be shedding a tear or two! The vicar is a really nice little man & made the service quiet humorous (don't know if he intended too), even though his other church had been broken into the night before (who does things like that?) - they had made a right mess all for an £800 projector. I personally enjoyed the old lady reading out the notices - she made me laugh a lot!
Amelia was an angel, all happy & gurgling. She smiled on cue to the vicar & was pulling his face about during her baptism -ahh, a crowd pleaser - she had Mum & Auntie Tricia in tears - we're such an emotional lot! Tracy & Tim (not a couple, even though some thought so) were fantastic Godparents - a good choice of mine & even Christian read his lines properly this time (he fluffed Alice's :)). Then during the rest of the service, Amelia slept on my shoulder, so everyone behind could see have cute she was.

Then at about 12:15, it was back to Christian's Mums for the party. I'd been planning, shopping & cooking for this part for weeks, so it was nice to finally enjoy all the work. The sun had been out for a while by now, so people could sit outside & the children could play in the garden, everything fit in to place. As you can imagine much fussing was needed to get all the food heated & ready, & this is when I stood on Alice's foot. Eeeww! I felt so bad, she had taken her shoes & socks off & I had changed into some lower heels - kitten heels & she was stood right behind me when I took a step back. I stood on her just above her toes, oh how she screamed, she had a perfectly round ring on her foot (which in now a bruise) - I felt so guilty but thankfully she's very forgiving & a pink wafer biscuit saved the day! Amelia was still being perfect & happily playing with Auntie Katie & Ben.

Then we had the food, which apparently went down rather well :) We had goulash, Thai green curry, vegetarian chilli, rice, new potatoes & salad. Followed by chocolate & raspberry pavlova (of course), lemon roulade, chocolate roulade, apple tart, plum pavlova, dairy-free carrot cake (gay) & strawberries. Not forgetting rather delicious Christening cake & all the booze you could drink - which wasn't much actually - it's now in our loft waiting for Christmas!

We all had a great time & it was lovely seeing all our friends from near & far. I would like to thank, Dianne & David for letting us take over their house - perfect setting, & Dianne again for all her help, Tracy & Tim for being brilliant Godparents, everyone for taking the trouble to come & all their lovely cards & gifts (I will be writing soon) & Dronfield Woodhouse Methodist Church for making the whole day possible. But mainly to Amelia, who is so lovely & happy, she didn't cry once all day - even when the Holy water was very cold - & she (as Alice did 3 years ago) showed off to everyone that I am the best mother in the world & good children aren't a gift - it's all about being a fantastic mother!!!

THE WANDERER RETURNS

This afternoon Mum's back from her holiday - yay! I can't wait to see the state she's in. Yes, my Mum went on holiday and had a mishap - no, I couldn't believe it either! (for those who don't know, if it's going to happen, it will happen to my Mum).

On Saturday morning (completely sober I might add), they went for a walk & she fell -doh! They have since spent the rest of the holiday in various Spanish doctors surgeries & cleaning up blood & she's been on anti-biotics, so no more booze! I think I'd have just come home! Apparently she's made quiet a mess of her upper arm - it needed stitches but they panicked & didn't go to hospital (!). All hear all about it later!

JOBSWORTH

Do you remember 'That's Life' on TV with Esther Rantzen & the 'Jobsworth' feature? Well I've found them a new one!

Yesterday, I took Alice to a 4 year olds birthday party at Easy Tigers (it's one of those awful play centres, all ball pools, slides & screaming kids!). It's hell on earth, as you can imagine, but children love it! Anyway, it was a party of about 20 3-4 years olds, their Mums & a few babies (I chose to leave mine at home!). You can imagine the scene, playing in the play area, a tea party followed by a disco - delightful! Whilst they were all eating their sandwiches, one Mum gave her 9 month old baby a bottle, who promptly through the whole thing up afterwards as babies do! No one thought anything of it, why would you? Then the (18 year old!) manager came into the party room & instructed the mother & baby to leave!!! for 'health & safety reasons'!!! We were all gob smacked!

Babies throw up, it's a fact, it's not even proper puke, it's just milk! The manager even walked outside with the mother, to make sure she left! The poor woman had to sit in the car, waiting for her daughter to finish the party. I still can't believe it, what a bloody jobsworth.

I should have told her about the time Amelia was sick in the baby ball pool & Lyndsey & I just mixed it in with the balls!!!

WHAT'S WRONG WITH MUMMY!

Since the girls & I stayed at my Mum's last week while the kitchen was being done, Amelia has started to talk. Well when I say talk, she can say one word. She says "Daa-dee" - Daddy? What about Mummy! Who's there for you 24/7, who feeds, cleans & looks after you? Who lovingly carried you for 9 months & graciously gave birth to you (no pain relief - did I mention that!), it certainly wasn't Daa-dee!! He just comes home 30mins before you go to bed & ignores you while he either plays with or goes on at Alice! Time for some re-grouping girls, altogether now Mum Mum Mum Mummy!

MY BABY BUTTERFLY

For a while now, Amelia has been moving around but no one knows how! She will only do it in private! You sit her on the floor, go in the kitchen for something or nip to the loo & when you get back, she's completely moved!

She must be getting brave (or cocky), because she is now doing her 'move' while I'm watching! She does the butterfly swimming stroke - but backwards! She only stops when she gets jammed under the settee & then pulls a load of dust out on her once white socks. Aahhh she's lovely!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 14

ITALY = MOULES ET FRITES

Yes, this is the Belgian offering following last week's little mix up! Another point to remember is, when buying fresh mussels from the fish mongers on a Saturday - get there before the bloody shop closes. The shop closed at 2pm & following our morning jaunt to Ikea, I got there at 2:20 - bugger! So dear reader, I had to make the best of a bad job with some supermarket bought fresh mussel meat. Not the same at all, but it was either that or some vacuumed packed mussels, still in their shells, but also in a rather suspect garlic butter sauce!
Conclusion: Get to the fish mongers in time!
Would I make it again? No. Yes with proper mussels.

Moules et Frites:
2 boxes of supermarket mussel meat(!), 1 finely chopped shallot, 2 finely chopped cloves of garlic, 1 finely chopped red chilli, 1 large glass of white wine, 150ml double cream, roughly chopped parsley, 4 large potatoes & olive oil.

1. Pre-heat oven to GM8. Peel & cut potatoes into chips & par-boil in slightly salted water for 5 mins. Toss in oil on a baking tray & sprinkle with salt, then bake for 30mins turning once.

2. Meanwhile, heat some oil in a saucepan over a medium heat & gently fry the shallot, chilli & garlic. After 5 mins, add the wine, bring to boil, then reduce heat & simmer for 15mins or so until the wine has reduced by half & lost the raw alcohol taste. Add the cream, nearly boil it & again reduce heat & simmer for 10 mins to thicken the sauce slightly (check for seasoning - may need a squeeze of lemon, mine did). Add the mussel meat & warm them through.

3. Place chips into bowls & pour over the mussel broth, sprinkle with chopped parsley.

BON VOYAGE

Mum & Auntie Tricia are off on their hols shortly. They are going to Porta Pollenca in Majorca, its a lovely place, Christian & I have spent many a pre-child holiday there. Some friends of my Mum have an apartment there & that's where they are all going - a good laugh to be had by all then!

The only problem is that (like me), Mum has a fear of flying - yet she keeps going away! I took homeopathy tablets last time(or placebo as Christian called them "They'll be saccharin that's all") & they really worked for me. Mum sees tablet taking as a weakness(!), so the poor thing has a very unpleasant day ahead - it will be worth it when she gets there!! Have a lovely holiday, but don't do a Shirley Valentine!! xxx

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 13

BELGIUM = SALTIMBOCCA

Well all I can say is that I'm pleased I didn't have race tickets for last weekend. I would have been sat there, in my McLaren hat & t-shirt wondering where everyone else was - "I thought the Italian's like F1", I would have thought!!! Silly cow, everyone was in Spa! It wasn't until half way through the qualifying that the penny finally dropped. Yes I could have run to the fishmongers & bought some mussels for our 'Moules et frites' but I had already defrosted my veal! Never mind, we'll have them next week!
Conclusion: Really nice, especially the sauce.
Would I make it again? Probably not with veal, unless it becomes easier to get hold of, you could try it with chicken or pork though.

Saltimbocca:
4 veal escallops, 4 large sage leaves, 4 slices of parma ham, 60g butter, salt & pepper, half a glass of white wine.

1. Place a sage leaf on top of each escallop & then cover with a slice of parma ham & secure with a couple of cocktail sticks.

2. Melt the butter in a large frying pan, over a medium heat. Season lightly & fry the Saltimbocca for a couple of mins on each side. Remove & place on warmed serving plates.

3. Pour the wine into the pan & turn the heat up high to gather up all the pan juices, then pour over the Saltimbocca.

We had them with chips & pepernato - just because I'm always looking for an excuse to make it! & it is Italian, I'm sure the Belgian's would love it!

COCO OR LEROY? WHO WILL SHE BE?

Yesterday, Alice went to her very first dance class - aaahhhh! Poor Shirley Tindall - she's been the teacher at the Bradway School Of Dance for the past 45 years, yes 45 years! - which means that she was my ballet teacher when I was 3 - all those years ago! Not a patient woman, but dance needs discipline. My friend, Ruth (who took her daughter Charlotte aswell) & I started quoting 'Fame' when the class finished, - to our 2, 3yr olds (imagine a large cane banging down on the floor), "Fame costs, & right here is were you start paying.... in sweat" - we had just promised to get them to practice at home!

Anyway, she learnt how to do 1st position & how to plie, how to mime being a frog, kangaroo & rabbit & I learnt that apparently my daughter has a problem pronouncing her 'Ls', hmmm this woman is apparently very good, so we'll let it go!! :) It was so emotional to watch - Ruth & I kept looking at each other with ours eyes full! Even when it was each others girl who had just done something good! or not!!!

However, driving home afterwards, just past Tinkers Corner (which is the start of the country stretch home), & just before the farm/stables/cattery/farm shop (ie BE CAREFUL) - there was a girl riding a horse in front of me - fine, hold back. But some bloody 'C U Next Tuesday' was driving in the opposite direction & drove past at such a speed, not slowing down. The puddle he drove through (a couple of meters in front of the horse), covered his car, the speed he was going was f***ing ridiculous - what is it with tw*tty lads? Poor pony, he semi reared (well, he backed right down on his hind legs & came up a bit at the front -don't know the official term for that), then spun round & started heading for my car. I stayed still for a while until she had settled him & asked her if she was OK & needed any help - she was fine, thankfully. But what an idiot, why would you think that driving like that past an animal would be ok? My cousin knackered her back following a similar incident.

THERE'S A FLY IN MY SOUP...

After all these years, I have finally had reason to say "There's a fly in my soup!" Having lunch with my Mum today (my homemade soup, at my house - can't complain!), there was a fly in my soup! Oh how we laughed when I uttered those very well known words!! Maybe we should get out more... no, it was genuinely really funny!!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 12

VALENCIA = CANALONS A LA BARCELONESA

Can you spot my mistake? Yes, my lack of research meant that I happily made Paella for the Barcelona Grand Prix - it's Spanish I thought. Well yes it is, but it originated in Valencia - you can only imagine how foolish I felt!! So here we have it, 2 Grand Prix's hosted in Spain, Barcelona with the national dish of Valencia & Valencia with the national dish of Barcelona - I can get over it & I'm sure you will too!! Anyway at least this little mix up added a bit excitement to the weekend, as the race sure as hell didn't provide any. Fortunately there had been a 3 week gap in races, so anything was better then nothing (only just though). Back to the cannelloni (apparently introduced to Barcelona from Italy in the 19th century).
Conclusion: Very good & different to the Italian version.
Would I make it again? I made double the quantity & put half in the freezer - a very good move!

Canalons a la Barcelonesa:
1/4 cup olive oil, 1 chopped onion, 2 minced cloves of garlic, 1 skinned & chopped tomato, 200g turkey mince, 200g pork mince, 200g veal mince, 3 chicken livers, 1/4 cup breadcrumbs, 1 beaten egg, 3-4 sprigs of fresh thyme, 1 tsp ground nutmeg, salt & white pepper, cannelloni tubes (or 12 sheets of fresh lasagne - as I used).
For the bechamel:
2 tbsp butter, 3 tbsp flour, 2 cups of warmed milk, salt & white pepper & 1/2 cup grated Parmesan.

1. For the canalons: Heat the oil over a medium heat & fry the onions & garlic for about 10 mins, lower the heat if they start to catch. Add the tomato & cook for another 5 mins. Add all the mince & livers, turn the heat up a bit & cook for 15 mins, stirring frequently. Mix the egg, breadcrumbs, thyme, nutmeg & salt & pepper. Stir into the meat mixture, remove from heat & allow to cool.

2. Preheat the oven to gm6. Spoon about a tablespoon (or a bit more), down the middle of the lasagne sheets (or fill the tubes), roll up & place seam side down in a buttered baking dish - quite squashed together so they don't unroll.

3. For the bechamel: Heat the butter over a low heat in a saucepan, add the flour & stir to form a thick roux, cook out for a couple of mins. Gradually add the milk, stirring constantly until the sauce thickens (about 10 mins), add salt & pepper & the cheese & stir off the heat as the cheese melts. Pour over the canalons, sprinkle with more cheese & bake for 25 mins.

WILLIES ARE GREAT

Those who know me best will know that I have a great fondness for anything willy! Now I have discovered a new Willie to admire! It's Willie Harcourt-Cooze. I watched his programme on channel 4 earlier this year, Willie's Wonky Chocolate Factory, a series about his deep passion for chocolate, growing the cacao in his forest in Venezuela, then bringing the beans back to this country & producing & marketing his 100% cacao bar. Very interesting stuff. Well yesterday, I was in Waitrose & finally bought a bar, a bit pricey (I first thought) at £5.99 but now I've actually used some it is so worth every penny.

I have just made some hot chocolate with it & I must admit, it's the nicest I've ever had. 1 part grated cacao, 1 part milk, 2 parts water, 1 tsp sugar, boil & drink - gorgeous! There's a recipe for a chocolate cake that I shall be trying when we come back from Richard & Sam's wedding this weekend & I've just found a nice sounding Mexican Mole recipe (savoury chilli & chocolate sauce), that I shall tweak & experiment with next week.

I can't recommend this enough - just go & buy some & have a play - what's 6 quid?, an everyday bottle of wine that's all, this is much better :-)

I FANCIED A CHANGE

Yes, I know Christian has changed his blog template & I am copying his idea - but I'm his wife, so I can!

Change is good - this can symbolise a new leaf turned. All the holiday fudge has been eaten (God bless The Original Rock Shop in Pwllheli!) & I'm fancying getting back into exercising properly - you can't push these things, you have to really need to do it & I think I have the need! I bet I can loose about a pound by the Christening!!

I would be quite happy to have dropped a dress size & feel a bit healthier by Christmas. Having said that, I bet we have a Chinese tonight! But change can be a slow process - wish me luck!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 11

HUNGARY = GOULASH

Yes, I know it's a week late - but we've been on holiday. Got back Friday, watched the race Friday night & had goulash Saturday night. I've been brought up on Delia Smith's goulash (a 70's thing I think!), so I ditched her recipe & found one on a Hungarian website - apart from that I didn't know where to find tinned chuck steak!!! - silly Delia!
Conclusion: Very tasty, I'd maybe use hot paprika next time instead of sweet (both smoked of course).
Would I make it again? Oh yes, a family classic!

Hungarian Goulash:
2 tbsp oil, 1 sliced onion, 2 crushed cloves garlic, 800g chuck steak, trimmed & cubed, 4 rashers of chopped smoked bacon, 200g sliced mushrooms, 400g tin tomatoes (or 6 fresh chopped toms), 1 green pepper sliced into rings, 1 bay leaf, 1 tsp mixed herbs, 2 tbsp paprika, salt & pepper, 150ml sour cream & chopped parsley.

1. Preheat oven to gm2/150c. Heat oil in a casserole & lightly fry onions & garlic.

2. Add beef & bacon & brown.

3. Add mushrooms, tomatoes, green pepper, mixed herbs, bay, paprika & salt & pepper. Stir well & bring to slow boil.

4. Put a lid on casserole dish & place in oven for 2 hours, stirring a couple of times.

5. Season again, if you think it needs it & stir through the sour cream & parsley.

6. Serve with rice or potatoes & braised red cabbage.

FIRST FAMILY HOLIDAY

On Friday, we returned, rather reluctantly from our 1st family holiday. We went camping in North Wales - just outside Abersoch - & had the best time ever! I spent all my childhood holidays around the same area, caravaning with Mum, Dad, Alison & sometimes Nan. So it was quiet emotional for me as we drove through all the places I'd been to before, now only Mum & I are still alive. But the excitement in our car of what lay ahead soon cheered me up! Mixed emotions lets say.But this was our holiday - a time for making new memories.

For our first time camping, I think we did really well. We had chosen a friendly small campsite, that only allowed small quiet families & no rowdy groups of singles! We erected our tent surprisingly well - about 30 mins - even though it was a bit breezy & unpacked our very overloaded car ( roof box for next time). My general theory to life is expect the worst & anything else is a bonus - so we were more than prepared for every eventuality! Plenty of clothes, food, games, 1st aid, blankets, pot & pans, suncream, everything that is apart from our waterproof coats that Christian had left on the sofa at home! DOH! - Never mind, we can't all be brilliant!

For the past week or so, family & friends had been telling us we would have a crap time, be too cold, not be able to sleep, never cope taking a baby etc all apart from my friend Lisa, who had faith & said we'd have a great time & if the weather is crap, just drink beer!! So to everyone apart from Lisa, up yours! We had a fantastic time, we didn't want to come home & we can't wait to go again. We must be natural campers or something. It did rain for half the time, but that didn't spoil anything & at least we know our tent is completely waterproof & you can cook inside!

Talking of cooking, we ate like kings! I had taken my desert island box of tricks - salt, pepper, sugar, garlic, chilli flakes, coriander, cumin, cayenne pepper & veg bouillon powder - so creations were made! I did feel a bit smug the night our neighbours (Alice's friend Rose & her parents), were eating tinned spaghetti on toast & we had locally caught fresh crab linguine with a warm chilli, lemon & brown crab meat dressing!

Alice had a great time too, when we weren't out on day trips, she was playing with Rose (6yr old in the tent next door), they were quite similar in that they both liked singing, running & pretending to be cats! It was so cute hearing them playing! Amelia's big news, apart from being superbaby & still sleeping all night, was that she sat up for the 1st time - hooray! I was so proud, we had some wine to celebrate!

As for day trips, we went to Portmeirion - which is fantastic, so many memories & now we have started watching The Prisoner since we got home. We went on the Snowdon Mountain Railway - which was amazing, if not a little cramped! It could only go up 3/4 of the way because of high winds, but it was still so worth it. We went to the Rabbit Farm & all held rabbits! Oh come on, we had a 3 year old girl with us!! We went to Caernarfon Castle but it rained so much that we didn't even get out of the car! So we went to Inigo Jones Slate Works instead & I finally bought a slate cheeseboard (well its a floor tile actually but don't tell!). Finally we did get to a castle, we went to Criccieth Castle because Alice wanted to be a princess - aahh!

As I keep saying, it was fantastic & our campsite was wonderful. We will definitely be going back there & maybe to France next year!!

HAPPY HALF BIRTHDAY

Today Amelia is 6 months old! I can't believe where the time has gone - it certainly does fly by.

I am pleased to announce that she has also recovered from her nasty croup incident, we're all healthy & ready for our camping trip on the 5th (can't wait!).

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 10

GERMANY = SAUERBRATEN

We had this last night (Monday) as, to be honest, we haven't been in all weekend! But it was well worth the wait.
Conclusion: You can't just decide to have Sauerbraten as it takes a few days to prepare, it doesn't look very pretty but it tastes amazing.
Would I make it again? Yes, you could even pass it off for a family Sunday lunch.

Sauerbraten:
480 ml red wine, 240 ml red wine vinegar, 120 ml water, 2 onions cut into wedges, leaves from a bunch of celery, 1tsp salt, 1tsp sugar, 2 tsp mustard seeds, freshly grated nutmeg, 5 cloves, 1 tsp lightly crushed black peppercorns, 4 sprigs parsley, 2 bay leaves, 1kg beef topside joint, 2 tbsp veg. oil, 50g crushed Gingernuts.

1. Place everything apart from beef, oil & biscuits in a large bowl & mix well. Now add beef, cover & leave for 3 days, turning several times.

2. Remove meat from marinade (reserving the marinade) & pat dry on kitchen paper, then season.

3. Heat oil in a large saucepan & brown beef on all sides. Add the marinade, bring to boil & simmer gently for 3 hours.

4. Remove beef & strain cooking liquor into a jug. Pour 120 ml into a smaller pan & bring to the boil. Then add the crushed Gingernuts & the rest of the liquor a little at a time, stirring constantly.

5. Continue boiling & stirring until the gravy has thickened.

6. Serve the sliced beef & gravy with potatoes & vegetables of your choice.

MORE AMELIA NEWS

On Friday she rolled over for the first time! Now if you put her on our bed, she rolls over & over right to the edge! Ahh!

IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA TO...

... start another weeks starvation style diet with last night's leftover Chinese for breakfast!

Thank heavens for my "suck your fat in" slip - it turns a wobbly post baby size 16 body into a nice toned size 14! So, if I buy the next size down & wear that on top, I will be a lovely size 10 & all will be well!!! (apart from turning purple).

I always remember Tracy saying (many years ago), we all spend a certain amount of time worrying about something. Her's was money & if she didn't worry about money, she would start worrying about her & Dan's health, so she'd rather worry about money.

I've always loved that thought & tell it to loads of friends when they worry about things. So, I'm quite happy to moan about being fat!
Anyway thin's overrated - eat a pie skinny!

TWO LITTLE TEETH

Hooray for Amelia! Yesterday she got her 1st tooth - it's on the bottom, the front left hand side one. Then this morning we found its partner, so now she has her 2 front teeth on the bottom -aahhh! She's still the smiliest baby in the land, she just has a rosy red cheek & is even more dribbley! She's so lovely - well done Amelia :)

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 9

BRITAIN = CONCESSION STANDS!

We could have stayed at home & had roast beef, but no, we went to Silverstone for the British Grand Prix & ate like pigs from Great British concession stands instead!
Conclusion: I just want some vegetables!
Would I do it again? Yes, just not until next year though!

Concession stands (or a heart attack in a polystyrene box!):
3 sausage baguettes, 1 bacon baguette, 3 1/4lb cheese burgers, 1 1/2lb cheese burger, 3 portions of chips, 1 beef sandwich, 1 steak sandwich, 1 portion of potato wedges & curry sauce, 2 breakfast baguettes, 2 bags of 6 doughnuts, 2 chicken tikka massala with rice & naan bread & 1 meal in the hotel restaurant.

1. Divide between 3 days & 2 fat bastards.

2.Feel crap & bloated for another week.

DID YOU SEE US?...WE WERE ON TELLY!

On Sunday evening, Christian & I arrived home from our fantastic 3 days away at the British Grand Prix at Silverstone. We had a brilliant time, although I really missed my babies!

On Friday morning at 7am, we dropped the girls off with Christian's mum & headed straight for Silverstone - having experienced long traffic delays last year, we knew that being very early was the key. Christian had bought us the very best seats available for the Sunday race - so we could sit where ever we wanted to on the Friday & Saturday for practicing & qualifying. So we did our usual walk round the whole circuit, sitting in all the grandstands, making sure our seats were the best - & they were!! We watched the F1 practices & some GP2 & Porsche stuff too, bought a load of presents(for us & the girls!) & headed off to find the hotel & more importantly the hotel bar.

Saturday was a bit of a lie in - 6am to be exact! Oh well, rather be waiting at the track than stuck in traffic! Christian listened to me this time & we got to park in the car park in front of the entrance, rather than in the back of some field - Mummy knows best!! & we had a lovely day (if not a bit wet & cold) watching the qualifying. The only slight blip was when I found a massive purple DVT vein on my leg & I was going to die before the day was out &..... it was a bruise from climbing over the seats on Friday!

Sunday was the best ever, I'm sure Christian will write about it in much more detail here. Our seats were fantastic - the pit straight grandstand - the covered bit of course (thankfully as it started to rain at about 8am & stopped 5 mins before the race finished!). We got to watch all the race build up & spotted all the celebs walking around the grid too. The race was amazing - wet races are my favourite as they are so action packed & this one didn't fail to please! Sitting opposite the pits meant that I could gather what was going on without a commentary by reading the drivers pit boards - they are really very useful! As Lewis started his last lap everyone was going mad - cheering & blowing air horns - so you can only imagine how loud it got when he actually won, very exciting. We watched all the podium presentations, then came home.

After we had put the children to bed, we watched the race again! When the camera panned over our grandstand, we paused it & saw ourselves on telly! Did you see us? We were those 2 faces behind the red & yellow blobs of the people sat in front of us!
What a brilliant weekend & such a shame there will only be 1 more at Silverstone - we will be there of course - same seats I hope Christian!

CHOCOLATE FUDGE DELIGHT

As mentioned in a previous post, I have been baking this week. Here is the chocolate fudge cock I made for a friend's hen night. Christian was disappointed that it wasn't pink, but the hen is a chocoholic & anyway brown willies are much bigger than pink (years of experience talking now!), so you can cut more slices!

While I was icing this cake, it took me back 6 years to my hen night - when that white stretch limo picked me up, with a sea of half cut friends faces inside & took me to the Moathouse for a Bee Gees tribute band night! Ahh what a naff, drunken time was had - fantastic, it has to be done!

FANTASY DINNER PARTY

You know that fantasy dinner party thing - where you choose living or dead, who you'd have for dinner. And you're supposed to pick people to make others think "Oh how clever & witty, I'd had never thought of that!" Like Martin Luther King, Gandhi, Elvis, Kylie & Nigella... Well I'd have, me & Christian (obviously), Mum, Dad, Alison & her really nice husband (one she deserved, not the twat she ended up with!). And after everyone had gone to bed (for we would live in a massive house - big enough to accommodate everyone) - Dad & I would stay up, open another bottle of wine & talk as we washed up.... That would be the best day of my life.

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 8

FRANCE = CASSOULET

There isn't a national dish as such from France, but I'm sure if you asked anyone to name a french dish then half a dozen would immediately spring to mind. Although Magny Cours is in central France, I opted for cassoulet from south west France because that's the area we were going to move to next year (this may still happen in a few years).
I have again moved slightly away from the traditional style in favour of the weight watching version. I omitted the duck, duck confit & duck fat, but as the best cassoulet recipe is the one your family invented & as long as it contains sausages & beans, we're ok!
Conclusion: Bloody lovely.
Would I make it again? Yes.

Cassoulet:
1lb herb & garlic pork sausage, 1 tin chopped tomatoes (or 1lb of fresh), 2tbsp tomato puree, 300ml pork stock, 1tbsp Lea & Perrins, 8oz mushrooms - sliced, 8oz baby onions -halved, 1 red pepper -diced, 2 cloves garlic - crushed, 1tbsp sweet chilli sauce, 410g can of butter beans - drained, salt & pepper & chopped parsley.

1. Cook sausages however you cook them (I do mine in the oven).

2. Place tomatoes, puree, stock & Lea & Perrins in a flameproof casserole & bring to boil. Add in garlic, onions, mushrooms, pepper & chilli sauce & simmer for 10 mins.

3. Add sausages, butter beans & salt & pepper to taste & simmer for a further 20 mins. Serve sprinkled with chopped parsley.

SO EMBARRASSING!

Prude is not a word you would use to describe me. I have just bought condoms for the second time in my life & I curled up with embarrassment! I was in Sainsburys, so I didn't even have to ask for them - I walked passed them twice, phoned Christian & then grabbed them off the shelf! I went all red & hot! I'm 35 for God's sake! I am allowed to have sex!

BACK TO CAKE MAKING

I have 2 cakes that I need to be making over the next couple of weeks. The first is Amelia's Christening cake, a 2 tier fruit cake job ( or maybe a sponge top tier - not quite decided) with some sort of modelling work involved - it will look fantastic I'm sure! The other is a huge chocolate cock!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 7

CANADA = POUTINE (pronounced put sin)

Hmmm! What can be said about poutine.... Well it's basically chips, cheese curds & gravy. Rather peculiar for a national dish but there you go. It's one of those things that sounds a bit odd, so it would probably be really good! I didn't use cheese curds (I actually didn't try to get them), I read that mozzarella was the next best thing - so I just used that. I think my problem with poutine is that I'm just not a fan of chips & gravy, I finished it though. It was quiet good as hangover comfort food - maybe the Canadians have lots of hangovers!
Conclusion: If I was Canadian, I would invent something else as a national dish!
Would I make it again? No!

Poutine:
Chips of your choice (I oven bake my own), cheese curds or 1 ball of buffalo mozzarella per person, very hot chicken gravy.

1. Cook chips, tear over cheese, cover with gravy & leave a couple of mins for the cheese to start melting.

CRESS

What a good idea cress is! It's the perfect bribe for getting children to eat eggs. Alice is currently growing some cress egg heads! First she had to eat a boiled egg & soldiers, to get the empty egg shell. Then she got to paint the egg shell. Now we are growing the cress in the egg shell. And in another 3 or 4 days she is going to eat an egg & cress sandwich! - maybe Jane could try this with Phil!

She is very impressed with her green fingers, she waters her plant every day & every morning she can't wait to see how much it has grown - very cute! I remember doing this as a child - it's exciting stuff!

KATIE PRICE & PETER ANDRE OWE ME 30 MINS

Last night, whilst searching through our many Sky channels to realise that there actually wasn't anything to watch, we happened upon "Katie & Peter - the next chapter". Ah ha, we thought, time to laugh at some "celebrities", but no, the joke was on us. What complete & utter dross. They really are a pair of losers. Why on earth would they think people are at all interested in watching them bicker about who is best, then make up, then bicker about who fancies the other one, then make up....... We watched for 30mins in amazement, hoping it was going to get better, but no!

I think the idea is we watch & think - "oh, I wish I was her/him. They really do have the greatest relationship & best sex life ever".
In reality we watch & think - "What a pair of insecure nobodies. Please don't give them another series!"

When I get to my final hour or 2 of life, I will remember that -Katie Price & Peter Andre - you owe me 30mins! What a waste!!

ROSE IS THE NEW LOUISE

In my class at school, way back in the 70's!, every other girl had the middle name of Louise - myself included. Now it seems that Rose is the new Louise. I know or have heard of (through Christian's work) a total of 7 babies born this year, all girls & all having the same middle name, Rose - my daughter included. Oh yes, & a hamster called Rosie!

THE LACK OF QUALITY FROM SAINSBURYS

For the past couple of years I have only been buying meat from proper butchers/farm shops, ever since I ordered some Jimmy's Farm bacon & couldn't believe the difference.

However, the other day, I was in Sainsbury's, it was getting on for teatime & I couldn't really be bothered lugging to grumpy children over to the butchers a couple of miles away, so I bought some Sainsbury's mince. It was their extra lean British beef mince, the one I used to buy previously & it was disgusting. Inedible really. I couldn't believe how crap the quality was - it's only mince for God's sake!

Please don't buy supermarket meat - find a nice friendly butcher (judge them by their sausages), it's so much tastier, you know where it's from & how it's reared & isn't really that much more expensive. If I can afford to switch, anyone can!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 6

MONACO = BOUILLABAISSE

Yes, I was surprised by that - it originated in Marseille, just further along the coast, but according to numerous Google pages, it is Monaco's national dish. My mother-in-law said, come to think about it, Monaco was the 1st place she ever ate bouillabaisse - so that works for me! It is one of those dishes that you can almost please yourself what goes in - fish wise. I found recipes with lobster, monk fish & turbot but I went for Nigel Slater's 1lb of assorted fish per person. I used cod, haddock, salmon, coley, pollack & mussels - which suited my pitiful budget nicely!
Conclusion: bloody gorgeous & surprisingly filling.
Would I make it again? I'd like to think so, but you don't often buy so much fish for 1 meal - maybe if we went on holiday near a fishing village - it would be criminal not to then!

Bouillabaisse:
3 cloves of garlic, 2tbsp olive oil, 6 anchovy fillets, 2 bay leaves, 3 sprigs of thyme, a 5cm curl of orange peel, a glass of white wine (I didn't have the previous 2 items - so I used a glass of orange juice instead & it really worked), 2 tins of chopped tomatoes, 500ml of fish or veg. stock, approx. 400g of assorted fish per person & about 24 mussels.
For the croutons:
8 thin slices of baguette, 2 red chillies, a small bunch of coriander & 4 spring onions.

1. In a large pan, gently heat oil & add the thinly sliced garlic, anchovies, orange peel, bay & thyme & cook until the garlic is golden & the anchovies have melted.

2. Add the wine (or orange juice!) & boil rapidly for a couple of mins.

3. Add the stock & tomatoes, bring to the boil, then simmer for 20 mins.

4. Skin & cut the fish into large chunks & add to the broth, firmest first, once opaque & tender, add the mussels. Cover with a lid & leave until the shells open. Serve with the croutons pushed in between the fish.

Croutons:
1.Toast the bread, de-seed the chillies, place in a mini processor with the coriander & spring onions & blitz to a fine paste. Spread over toasts & serve in the soup.

MUM

Hooray, Mum's coming home today!

My Mum has been holidaying in France for the past 10 days & I have really missed her. We have been texting every day but it's not the same as speaking - we have a good "put the world to rights" chat every morning usually. Her & my Auntie Tricia are coming for a Moroccan Sunday lunch tomorrow - should be french I suppose but never mind, the food isn't the star of the day - my Mum is!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 5

TURKEY = KEBABS

We had to have these on Saturday night, as we were selfishly invited out for Sunday lunch -who does Sunday lunch on a race weekend?!;-)
They were very quick & easy, if not a bit fatty but that's lamb for you.
Conclusion: Really tasty & easy to make.
Would I make them again? Yes, I might make them half the size though - a definite meaty mouthful!

Turkish Kofta Kebabs:
900g minced lamb, 2 grated onions, 6 crushed cloves of garlic, 2 tsp chilli flakes, 1 handful of chopped parsley, oil for brushing.

1.Soak 8 bamboo skewers in cold water.

2.Put everything (apart from the oil) in a large bowl with plenty of salt & pepper & mix together with your hands until bound together.

3. Divide the mixture into 8 & mould it into long sausage shapes around the skewers.

4. Brush with oil & cook on a griddle for a couple of mins each side, until browned & cooked through.

5. I served them with cucumber, yogurt & mint - which is self explanatory (chop & mix together!)

BOGIE SUCKER

Being an avid picker of things in general, I have just bought la piece de resistance! It's for Amelia, as she has a bit of a snuffy nose & can't blow it herself at 14 weeks old. It's a nasal aspirator. You put 1 end at the bottom of her nose, then you suck the other end!!! A chamber collects the gunk - don't worry! It's so disgusting - it's fantastic!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 4

SPAIN = PAELLA

It had to be Paella! Mind you it wasn't as authentic as it should have been, after a month of terrible budgeting on my part & 3 days till payday, I invented a store cupboard Paella! Well the majority of national dishes are peasant foods anyway!
Conclusion: Really tasty & perfect for the hangover from hell that I was suffering from.
Would I make it again?: Yes, it was lovely. I've made paellas before & they were quite stodgy, I think the trick was cooking the rice separately.

Paella:
400g long grain rice (already cooked in chicken stock with a pinch of saffron added to the water), 200g chorizo cut into £1 coin size slices, 200g jumbo king prawns, 1 onion chopped, 1 red & 1 yellow pepper diced, 2 handfuls of frozen peas.

1. Fry the onion & peppers in a bit of olive oil to soften, the add the chorizo & fry for another 5 mins or so, until the oils are released from the chorizo & the edges start to get crispy.

2. Stir in the peas & prawns & after a minute or 2 add the rice & stir to combine.

3. Divide between 2 hungover parents & 1 small girl & eat out of a bowl whilst watching the Grand Prix, feeling very sorry for yourself!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 3

BAHRAIN = FALAFEL

I have been very impressed by these falafel pittas we have had today. As one is watching one's weight, I was delighted to find a weight watchers recipe for falafel & it wasn't crap! Very satisfying actually.
Conclusion: Healthy, satisfying & low fat. Would I make them again? Definitely, they were bloody lovely!

Falafel Pittas With Cucumber Sauce:
410g can of chick peas drained & rinsed, 1 crushed clove of garlic( I forgot to put this in!), 50g breadcrumbs, 4 sliced spring onions, 1 egg, 1tsp ground cumin, 175g finely diced cucumber, 3tbsp chopped coriander, 1 tbsp mint jelly, 150ml 0% fat Greek yogurt, 4 pittas & shredded Iceberg lettuce.

1. Preheat oven to GM5 / 190c.

2. Put chick peas, breadcrumbs, garlic, cumin, spring onions, egg & salt & pepper into a food processor & blitz until smooth. Roll into 20 small balls, place on a baking tray (lined with greaseproof) & bake for 15mins with a dab of olive oil on each ball.

3. Mix together the cucumber, mint jelly, coriander & yogurt to make the sauce.

4. Split the warmed pittas & fill with shredded lettuce, falafel & cucumber sauce.

AMELIA'S LONG NIGHT

Huzzah!, we've cracked it again with another "angel baby" (the highest award given by The Baby Whisperer for my children!). At 9 weeks & 3 days old, Amelia Rose Briddon has slept through the whole night! 7:30pm to 6:30am - what a star!

I gave her a dream feed at 10pm, sounds very American I know, but it's just feeding your baby without waking her up & she stayed asleep for ages - 11 hours, I'm very impressed. Let's see if tonight's the same.....

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 2

MALAYSIA = FISH & FRAGRANT CURRIES

According to Ken Hom "In Malaysia, fresh fish is a standard item in every home". So after reading that I decided that we would try a Malaysian fish curry. I'm guessing you could use any fish you like in it, I'm going to try it again using raw large prawns, then with salmon.....
Conclusion - Very good indeed & very quick to make. Would I make it again?- Definitely & soon!

Malaysian Fish Curry:
1lb skinned fish of your choice (I used haddock)-cut into big chunks, 1 roughly chopped onion, 5cm piece of ginger & 2 cloves of garlic chopped, 2tbsp hot curry paste, 1 tsp ground coriander, 1/2tsp ground fennel seeds, 1/2tsp turmeric, 2tbsp lemon juice, 200ml coconut milk, boiled rice to serve.

1. Put onion, ginger, garlic, curry paste, spices & lemon juice in a food processor & blend together, then add 1/2 the coconut milk & blend again.

2.Pour remaining coconut milk in a wok over a medium heat, add the curry mixture & simmer for 5 mins.

3. Add the fish pieces & cook for another 5 mins.

4. Serve immediately with the rice.

MY BIG FAT BACKSIDE

Yesterday I was abused in Sainsburys by a twatty little man. We (me, Alice & Amelia) were leaving the shop, Amelia started crying so I stopped to find her dummy. As this was happening an old woman came over & started shaking her arms saying "Ahh, what's the matter". I can't stand passers by touching my children, so I said "Can you not do that, she's upset already". I began to walk away & the old woman's son (I imagine - looked about 40) said - in his very lovely thick Sheffield accent "Well there's no helping some people, you obviously can't look after your own baby". Rather shocked I told him to "Mind your own business" to which he replied "You can't look after your baby, you don't know what you're doing". I couldn't believe what he was saying so I said "Oh shut up, you common pleb" & started to walk away, still shocked & shaking now. Then came the worst part - in the middle of Sainsbury's car park he shouted "Oh my God, look at the size of her arse, you fat cow". I held it together to pack the girls & shopping in the car - then cried all the way home (& most of the afternoon)!

Today, I'm just angry. I still won't allow strangers to touch my children. I know I have a big arse. I am a good mother. So why is this twat still in my head? Aargh!

FORMULA FOOD - ROUND 1

AUSTRALIA = KANGAROO

We have just eaten our kangaroo stroganoff, which was actually very nice. The meat in its raw state looked like a large piece of liver. After cooking it was very lean & tasted a bit beefy & the texture was that of liver.
Conclusion - surprisingly nice, very low fat too. Would I buy it again? - Probably not!

Here's the recipe:
1tbsp rapeseed oil, 1 sliced onion, 1 crushed clove of garlic, 1lb kangaroo steak (I used rump) cut into thin strips, 200g sliced mushrooms, 1tsp paprika, 1tbsp Lea & Perrins, 2 tbsp brandy, 300ml stock, 100g creme fraiche, salt & pepper.

1. Heat the oil in a pan, add the onion & garlic, reduce heat & cook gently for 5 mins to soften the onion. Turn heat back up & add the kangaroo meat, stir fry for 5 mins until sealed on all sides.

2.Add the mushrooms, paprika, Lea & Perrins & brandy & cook stirring for 2 mins. Add the stock, bring to boil, reduce heat & simmer for 20 mins - stirring now & then.

3.Add the creme fraiche & season. Heat through, but don't allow to boil - as sauce may separate. We had it with rice.

FORMULA FOOD

This weekend sees the start of this year's formula 1 season - I can't wait, Christian & I have been looking forward to this for ages (Sunday is also 15 years since our 1st kiss - & before you ask, no he isn't taking me out - I'm babysitting while Christian goes out!).

Anyway, this year I have decided to combine 2 of my favourite passions - food & F1.

As each grand prix is in a different country, I am going to cook something traditional to that country or something that country is famous for. For example, this weekend is in Australia. There isn't anything particularly traditional from Oz, other than shrimps on a barbie & Vegemite sandwiches, so we'll be having stroganoff - kangaroo stroganoff to be exact - do you see how this is going to work?! It's just a good excuse to play with different foods I probably wouldn't think of trying. I'll post each race weekend to tell you what we've had & how it was.

The most uninteresting will be the British grand prix as thanks to a couple of start/finish line tickets, we'll be eating from concession stands that weekend - not bad though for a country that seems to think chicken tikka massala is one of its top 10 dishes, but that's a different post!

A DUMMY - NOT IN MY HOUSE!

I have recently done something to my 6 weeks old baby that I am ashamed off - Christian will go mad when I tell him. I can't bear to see babies/small children sucking on a dummy, I much prefer thumb sucking! I know that there's a bone in a thumb & it can push their front teeth forward & blah blah blah (the dentist told me off after seeing Alice sucking her thumb!) but this image is so much nicer than a dummy face.

Anyway - I have just given Amelia a dummy & she loves it!!!! She has been crying on & off all day, so to save my sanity more than anything I tried her with an old dummy that we had for Alice (she hated it!) & peace has been restored - hooray!! Now I can get on with the housework I've had on hold for 6 weeks - not so hooray!!

WELL DONE CHRISTIAN

After 27 days, Christian has finally changed one of Amelia's nappies!

BREAST IS BEST

I'm astonished - I have spent the week not being healthy at all, eating fish & chips, sandwiches, cheese, chocolate & every chocolate product imaginable & not exercising at all & I have lost 6 pounds! Fanbloodytastic!

Apparently, on average, breast feeding burns about 700 calories a day. And when Amelia has her marathon 3 hour feeds (7pm - 10pm bless her!) it must be burning off more! Now if I can just get the rest of the family to join in, I could be a size 0 by Easter...hmmmm!.......

A WARNING TO TEENAGE CHECKOUT BOYS

If you are a teenage checkout boy please listen. Don't try to slag off a crying baby to her mother, the joke will back fire on you & your face will go so red that your spots will disappear into the firey glow.

Teenage Checkout Boy- Does he ever shut up?
Victoria- You were a baby once, did you?
TCB- He makes a noise, doesn't he?
V- SHE is a baby. Babies can't speak you know, they have to cry to communicate. She's only saying she's fed up & wants to go home.
TCB- My Grandma says problem babies make nice adults.
V- She isn't a problem baby. Were you a good baby then?
TCB- I'm confused...
V- Shall we just get on with the job in hand?
TCB- Sorry. Would you like any help with your....
V- NO.

HAPPY BACK TOGETHER ANNIVERSARY

Here is a very yummy chocolate fudge cake that I have made for Christian because today it is 8 years since we decided to give "us" 1 last chance to work!

Although we started seeing each other 15 years ago, we had a bit of a rocky start - to say the least! We used to work at the same pub all those years ago & after chasing & finally tricking me, Christian & I became an item. It was soon very obvious that I was more bothered about us than he, as he would frequently dump me whenever he might be in a situation whereby he would have to spend any money on me - like birthdays, Christmas etc - then take me back a week or 2 later. For example, for my 21st birthday, Christian bought me a drink! More fool me, some might say!

After a couple of years of this treatment, enough was enough & we went our seperate ways - not for long though.... can't live with, can't live without. But now it was my turn to be in charge! Christian was more bothered about me this time & didn't I just play it! We had a couple of years of being "friends with benefits"! Even Justin (Christian's brother) used to tell me off for this behaviour with "Stop messing my brother about, you're either with him or not"!

We then had another cooling off couple of years with not much contact other than letters, cards & drunken I love you phone calls! Then Christian sent me a letter stating that he was fine, life was great etc & I thought, "oh no you don't, what about me"! Time for a visit. We met up again & decided on 1st February 2000 that we were going to try 1 last time & if it didn't work, we would leave each other alone. Fortunatly, by this time we had both grown up a bit & knew that we only ever wanted each other anyway!

So there you have it, 8 years on, a mortgage, a wedding & 2 beautiful little girls & I'm the happiest person in the world! I love you Christian xxxxx

AMELIA ROSE BRIDDON

She's arrived!!! Finally, 9 days late, after all my whinging, the joint 1st most beautiful baby in the world was born!!
It all happened in the early hours of Sunday 27th January, I had got up to go to the loo at about 2:45, after, I heard 2 weird ripping/bursting sounds followed a stream of fluid! Knowing full well that this wasn't wee! I sat back down on the loo & called out that old familiar phrase, "Christian, I think my waters have just broken" - fortunately Alice was staying at my Mum's as we suspected something would happen this weekend.

I phoned the hospital, who advised me to "hang on until the morning before coming in" - from previous experience Christian & I knew that wasn't going to happen - then as the fluids kept on flowing, the contractions started. The 1st wasn't too bad, 15 mins later the 2nd was more uncomfortable, another 7 mins this time & Christian began his very important job of counting out loud for the length of the contraction. This gives me something to concentrate on & an idea that by 25ish it should start calming down a bit.

Anyway, we got in the car & thus began the most horrible car journey! The contractions were coming every 3 mins & lasting 40 - 50 seconds. I feel really sorry for the poor receptionist at Jessops hospital, I walked in, gave her my name & as she was starting to tell us where to go, I started staggering around saying "count Christian, count" & moaning "oh no...pant, pant, deep breaths" & a few seconds later then said "Sorry, which room did you say"!
After my rather dramatic entrance, I was examined straight away, bunged in to a wheelchair & raced down the corridor to a delivery room - I was fully dilated & ready to push (an action which cannot stop once you're ready to go!)

6 pushes later & no pain relief at all may I add, the very beautiful Amelia was handed to me, all 8lbs & 5ozs of her, aahhh!

Christian cut the cord & photographed the placenta, like all proud fathers do! Then we sat back, ate toast & drank tea, listened to the poor cow in the next room screaming, & laughed about the most ridiculous 100mins we had just spent, since I had got up in the night for a quick wee!!!

All pictures are here.

THE END IS NIGH

I think this will be my final pregnancy update! I am now 8 days late, the same as I was with Alice so fingers crossed. I saw the midwife yesterday & had an internal sweep, think latex gloves & James Herriot! She felt the baby's head & told me I was 3cm dilated, so something is happening. She also booked me in at Jessops Hospital to be induced if still no sign by next Friday & was laughing with the woman on the phone about me not making it that far anyway, she said she was 100% certain I will be delivering before then!

We thought the baby was coming last night as I was having light (10-15 second) contractions about every 30 mins - we were very excited, Alice slept at my Mum's, we went to bed to grab some sleep before lift off but these contractions had stopped when I woke up for my 12:30 wee -bugger!

Oh well, we'll see what today brings! I might also add that the final weight gain has been 2.5 stone! & my waist currently measures 49 & 3/4 inches!!! Get on that cross trainer Chunky!!!!

MY GOD WOMAN, CHEER UP!

I am such a miserable cow at the moment! All I seem to do is moan & complain. Believe me, I do know just how fortunate I am to be 39 & a half weeks pregnant, although we have the very perfect Alice, we were 2 years trying for her, with a rather cruel miscarriage just before her, then another year of trying & 2 more miscarriages before this baby (teenage chavs seem to just get pregnant by thinking about it), SO WHY AREN'T I ELATED?

Poor old Christian & Alice don't know where they are with me, I'm a fluffy bunny one minute & a pit bull the next, everything is too much trouble, walking upstairs leaves me breathless, sitting makes my pelvic bones ache, standing gives me backache, lying down is too much hassle for the amount of time it takes to get up, etc......
I don't remember feeling like this the last time. When I listen to myself it really upsets me because I think "You ungrateful cow!"

It won't be long now (I hope) & I'm actually looking forward to the giving birth part! I just want to hold our new baby in my arms & know that all is well. As for me, I will return to my usual old self & be able to run & jump up & sleep on my front & use my new cross trainer &.......